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Monday, February 16, 2009

Too funny - Too bad it's true

I had to share what I found on someone else's blog about the stimulus package:

Sometime this year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment? A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money? A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money? A. No, they are borrowing it from China . Your children are expected to repay the Chinese.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment? A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ? A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:
If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China .
If you spend it on gasoline it will go to Hugo Chavez, the Arabs and Al Queda
If you purchase a computer it will go to Taiwan .
If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico , Honduras , Chile , and Guatemala .
If you buy a car it will go to Japan and Korea .
If you purchase prescription drugs it will go to India and Canada .
If you purchase heroin it will go to the Taliban in Afghanistan .
If you give it to a charitable cause, it will go to Nigeria .

2 comments:

Laurel Plum said...

The title says it all. I have got to share this!

Gwenny said...

If you put it in the bank, the bank will lose it. ::sigh:: Maybe we should just all go buy prostitutes?